Coming Home
by warriorbard2012
Summary: Santana returns to Lima to fight for her relationship with Brittany, an AU and a revision of the "Mine" Scene. Spoilers up to 4x04.
1. Making a decision

**A/N: After all of the Rumors and Hype that have been surrounding Episode 4x04, and after listening to "Mine" on repeat for the past several days, I felt inspired to write this. I'm not used to writing in first person, so sorry if it seems weird. Anyway let me know what you think or if you want me to continue.**

Sighing, I juggle my gym bag and my backpack, trying to lose either one, as I fish for my keys out of my pocket. I enter my dorm room quietly, already knowing that my roommate is asleep. It's 2 O' Clock in the morning, and I am coming home late after a long day of classes, homework and a killer cheer practice. The door creaks when I close it, and I wince, hoping that the sound won't wake Angie up. I've noticed since moving here that she gets really cranky when she's tired, and I don't really like it.

Moving over to my side of the room, I place my gym bag and my backpack on the floor by my bed, and collapse on to the blanketed surface, exhausted. I know that I should probably undress, or at least take my bra off since I will probably be sore in the morning, but I'm too tired to move. I close my eyes, and I snuggle into my pillow, but despite my tiredness sleep does not come.

On my nightstand, my phone suddenly lights up, and I slap my forehead, realizing that I didn't even notice that I left it here all day. I don't even have to look at it to know that it's a message from Brittany, but when I do see it the message breaks my heart.

_Brittany: I guess that I'll talk to you tomorrow. Ly. :(_

My fingers ache to text her back, but I know that it's late and that I should let her get to sleep, that I have to sleep. Slowly, I force myself to set the phone back down next to me on the pillow, and I close my eyes tightly. In my mind I can see her, and I know exactly what she is doing. I can see her lying on her bed the same way, I am, holding her phone tightly in her hand, waiting. Her eyes are closed to, and I know that she is picturing, although what she is imagining me doing I don't know. I can see tears falling down her cheeks and it breaks my heart to know that I put them there.

I never had imagined that it would be this hard. I crave her presence like a drug, and I miss her so badly that it's a real ache. I know that this year apart has been hard on her, and I wish that I could do more, but I feel so helpless knowing that I'm so far away, that I can't wipe those tears away, or hold her. But at least I know that she has friends to help her out… Sam has texted me a couple of times, and it makes me feel better to know that he is looking out for her as long as that is all that he is doing.

But even then I have to wonder if we are doing the right thing, if I'm the right thing for her right now. And while I know that I'm still insecure about losing Brittany to a man, I know that her happiness is my own, and that if Sam would make her happy then I wouldn't stand in her way. But it would break my heart to see it….

That thought makes me angry, and I turn over violently on my bed, shoving my face into my pillow and screaming in frustration, which just leaves me feeling more empty inside, and I feel tears falling down my cheeks. I'm so tired…not just physically, but mentally and emotionally. I just want Brittany…

I'm struck with a sudden thought that makes me sit up. I don't have classes tomorrow, because of some Student forum thingy. I reach for my phone and shove it into my jeans, and then I grab my gym bag, and dump it out on the bed, before running over to my dresser, and shoving clothes into the main pocket. I follow that with my bathroom stuff, and last but not least the guitar from my closet that was a gift from my dad after I learned to play it last summer. I manage not to slam the door as I leave my dorm room and walked down the hall. My heart flutters in my chest, as I tell myself that I'm going to give Brittany and I a fighting chance, and I can only accomplish that by seeing her face to face. I'm going to sing her a song, and tell her how much she means to me, and ask if she wants to continue to give us a shot, or if she wants us to just let go. And as much as it pains me to do so I will, because I can't keep hurting her anymore.

I have to be the mature one now, and I have to do the right thing… but I'm not letting her go without a fight.

**A/N: For any of who are reading my other story, I'm working on the next chapter. I just got distracted with new episodes, so don't despair I haven't abandon it, and it should be up within the next few days. **

**Anyway, I hope that you liked this one, and If you want me to continue, let me know. Remember to review, I want to know what you think, or if you have any predictions for what is going to happen in the episode tomorrow.**

**PS: I also joined Tumblr, so look me up. My user page is under the same name as my user name here (Warriorbard2012). So if you want to ask me questions about my stories or review, you can there as well. **


	2. A Long Journey

**A/N: A great big thank you to everyone who review or add this story to your alerts! Your response was amazing, and it made feel super inspired, so thanks alot! :) Okay, so here is chapter 2. This is still Santana's pov. I think that next chapter will be Brittany's but I felt that Santana still had more to decide about her relationship with Brittany before they see each other, so that is what this Chapter is about. **

**I forgot to add disclaimers last chapter so here they are now: I don't own Glee, and if I did it would be the Brittana show, and I wouldn't put my loyal views though an agonizing week of hell by telling them that their favorite couples are going to break up. **

After throwing my stuff not so neatly in the truck of my car, I pull out of the parking lot, and head for the interstate, eager to begin the 227 mile drive home. However, my excitement fades a little, when I hear the gas light ding on. Sighing and cursing myself for not filing up earlier that day, I began the hunt for the nearest and cheapest gas station.

Not surprisingly, the first gas station I see is empty, since it is close to 3 in the morning. I pull up to the first pump, and park before heading inside to prepay. The stand of energy drinks beckon me as I enter the door, reminding that I'm tired and I have a four hour drive to make. I quickly grab a few cans of RedBull®, and a couple packages of beef jerky and some hot Cheetos® before I head to the counter. The older gentleman who serves as the cashier looks half awake, and he gives me a sleepy nod as he rings up my purchases and my gas.

"Going somewhere?" He asks, making light conversation to break the monotony of his night.

"Yeah, I'm heading back home to visit my girlfriend for the weekend." I say without hesitation, I'm not afraid anymore, and besides I'm only going to see this guy one time, so who cares if he knows my life story. However, I do expect him to give me a typical comment, like that's hot, or you're going to hell.

"She must be a keeper than." He comments quietly, giving me a small smile and a knowing look.

"She is." I answer, as I hand him my credit card.

"Than a girl like that is worth fighting for." And I have to close my mouth as I marvel at the coincidence in his words. He hands me back my credit card, and I sign the receipt. And as he hands me my bag with my food and drinks in it, I make a note of the name on his tag. Andrew, it says, and I make a note to come back here on the return trip to let him know if he was right or not.

I turn to go, and as I place my hand on the door, I hear him say once more.

"Good Luck, Miss."

"Thanks." I reply, knowing that I'm going to need it.

I return to my car, and fill up the tank, before climbing back in. Before I pull out of this parking lot, I decide to plug in my iPod. I click on the playlist that Brittany made for me on V-Day last year. The crazy intro to Disco Duck fills my car, and I can't help but smile. I remember the first time we heard it shortly after we became friends.

She had invited me over to hangout with her one afternoon after Cheerios practice, and that day her parents had just bought a record player and a ton of records for their rec room in their basement, and they had shown us how to us it as long as we promised to be careful. Brittany had been going through a box of their 45's and had come across the dusty _The Original Disco Duck_ record. Brittany had liked the album cover, so she figured that the song had to be great too. And it was, and I found to my surprise that I could do the duck's voice perfectly. We danced to that song all night. I used that voice for months after that make her laugh on sad days, and we played that song whenever we were feeling blue. It was a silly little freshman thing, and we sort of stopped when we were sophomores, and things became more serious at school. But I never forgot about that, and I had been surprised to that she had remembered about Disco Duck too.

A loud honk from behind my car jolts me from my thoughts. I look around realizing that I was still in the gas station parking lot. I wave to the impatient person behind me, before I drive out of the lot, and back on to the road heading for the Interstate once more. I seem to hit every red light that there is, and I wonder what happed to the flashing yellow lights that there are suppose to be after ten or whatever, and for a moment I wonder why the world is conspiring against me. I reach down for my ipod to change the track, and my tired fingers drop it. I manage to catch it before it hits the floor, but it reshuffled my music in the process, and the opening strains of Taylor Swift's "Mine" starts playing loudly through my speakers. I'm not a big Taylor Swift fan, and I know that this is one of the songs that Brittany must have added to my ipod, but I find myself not wanting to change the track.

The light turns green, and I continue driving, finally pulling onto the on ramp of the Interstate; the one that will lead me straight to home, straight to Brittany. Taylor Swift's voice continues to fill my car, and I smile as she sings: _You are the best thing that's ever been mine. _

Suddenly I realize that this is the song… this is the one that I have to sing to Brittany. She is the best thing that's ever been mine. My mind flashes back to what I said to Rory almost a year ago now. _She's beautiful, she's innocent, she's everything that's good in this in this miserable, stinking world._ I refuse to give that up…

"Mine" eventually fades into some other song, but the lyrics are burned into my head, and fingers already itch to play the chords that my ears recognize as fairly simple. I look down at the time and I realize that it would be about 8am by the time I would reach Lima, providing that Traffic wasn't murder. That should give me about 2 hours to sleep, and 2 hours to practice, and would still give me plenty of time to surprise Brittany for lunch at McKinley.

I felt rejuvenated, and the tiredness that I had been feeling just a hour ago, seemed to melt away. As I drove, I thought about what I would say to Brittany when I saw her. I thought about what she would say to me back. Every possible thing went through my head from bad to good, and I realized that I really had no way of knowing… I had lost that much touch with my girlfriend that I couldn't read her as easily as I used to be able too.

I added it to the growing list of things that would have to change. And while normally, I would be terrified by what that list would mean, but all it did was give me hope. Hope that I could make this work, that we could make this work. That maybe this wasn't the end, but only the beginning of a new chapter, a chapter that would lead to us being stronger together, and that it would the start of the rest of our lives together.

With that thought lodged in my head ringing over and over again, until it became my mantra, I pushed down the gas pedal down just a little bit more, counting down the miles until I was in Lima, and I could see my girlfriend again.

**A/N: Well, there it is. What do you think is going on in Brittany's head during this whole time? Do you think that Brittany will be ready to continue their long distance, or do you think that they were break things off? Please Review and Let me know what you think!**

**And as for the episode tonight: May the odds ever be in your ships favor, and remember that even if things don't go our way, that they have a whole season to work things out, and if not there is always fanfiction. Fanfiction is better than the real thing sometimes anyway, and with the way that this fandom writes, I know that amazing and wonderful stories will come out of this. So until then, Keep the Faith, and remember that our ships are always Endgame in our hearts, and no powers that be can ever kill them there. **


	3. So Alone

**A/N: The inspiration is just exploding with this story. This chapter is from Brittany's POV and it takes place before she sent Santana the text from Chapter 1. I'm still trying to figure out Brittany's voice, which is kind of hard considering that her character is mostly reduced to crazy one liners, that really don't reveal anything about her. I am, one who sees Brittany as more than just her dumb blonde persona, and like Santana is with her HBIC Bitchiness I think that it is just a mask to hide herself from the cruel world around her. So I say all that to say that I'm sorry if it's a little OCC for Britt, but it will get better in time. So anyway, on with the story.**

**Once again, I don't own Glee. If I did, Santana will ask Britt to marry her at the end of tonight's episode.**

Coming into my room, I throw my backpack on to my floor, and I flop down on my bed, and bury my face into my pillow, finally letting the tears I had been holding back all day out. It's after 1am, and Blaine and Sam's Victory Party at Breadstix had run very late. I had waited for hours hoping that I could find some excuse to leave, and not make it look like a sore loser, but I couldn't come up with any. This has been the worst month ever. I haven't physically seen Santana in four weeks and two days, and our texting and Skype chats aren't any better. I know that I made a joke to Blaine and the rest of the New Directions, about how Scissoring was hard of Skype, but Santana and I haven't even done that. I just said that because I know that it was something that they were expecting me to say… because they think that I'm dumb, and maybe I am. My mom has always said that I'm different, but I've always thought that she meant it in a good way.

I always thought that the kids in Glee club were different than the rest, and I know that they mean well, and that in their own strange way that they do care, but it's hard to hear over and over again from the people that are suppose to be your friends that they think that you are dumb. Last year it was hard to handle, but I fought against it. But now, I just feeling like my very presence back here at this school has done nothing but prove them right. And now it's not just my friends that think I'm dumb but the whole school too. I can hear Artie's voice in my head mocking me: _90% of those respondents said they were coming to hear you say something stupid. _At least he was cautious about using that term now, because despite what I said to him, I remember that we dated, and I also remember how I chose someone who thought that I was a stupid blonde girl, over someone who has always thought that I was the best, and the smartest thing ever.

But still getting called stupid, and me throwing the debate causing me to lose my spot as President didn't hurt as bad as getting kicked off the Cheerios (even if it was just for a week)… that was my home, the one place besides Glee Club where I could still feel Santana's presence, and was connected to her in some way. It was just one thing that we had in common right now besides each other. And hearing Sue tell me that I couldn't be captain anymore because of my grades killed me. Where was she last year? Why is everyone so determined to help me this year when no one cared last year? Why can't they see that it doesn't matter that it's too late… a year too late.

It was our dream going to college together, or if not college than leaving Lima together, to move to some far off place, like New York or L.A. And it hurts so bad to be left behind, because I'm too stupid to pass my Senior year. I hate how everyone thinks that I failed with a 0.0 GPA, but I'd rather them believe that I failed completely than for them to realize that I failed just two classes. I was two credits short… and summer school was full.

When I told Santana that day at Breadstix when we were having dinner with her mom, that I wasn't going to Graduate, I hadn't expected things to be so hard. I had expected that redoing my Senior year would be a lot like last year, but I realized today that last year was only fun because she was there with me. She gave me the courage to be myself, to run for President, that I could hold a great Dino Prom… but now, I don't have anyone who believes in me here anymore.

Maybe if things would be different if I could talk to her more, but I know that things have to be hard for her too. At least I have my parents, and my old friends, she's up there all alone, and she has to do everything for herself. There's no there to remind her to eat, to do her homework, and to go to sleep when it gets too late. Her parents and I aren't there to care for her, and I know that had to be hard to be somewhere where it's just you, and no one knows or really cares whose daughter you are or what side of town you come from. You are one face in a thousand faces…

But that doesn't stop me from wishing that she would try to talk to me more. Speaking of which, I remove myself from my pillow, and wipe my eyes. Sighing, I move over to my desk, grab my Mac from where it was charging, and return to my bed. I turn it on and I open up iChat, hoping beyond hope that maybe she be on and be up, and we could talk. Or maybe we could switch to Skype, and we can fall asleep with the video chat on like we did the first night that she was at the dorms. But instead her iChat availability remains red, and my heart falls.

I miss her so much…. Sighing I reach for my phone and send out one last text.

_Brittany: I guess I'll talk to you tomorrow. Ly _

I close down my computer, and I put it back on my desk. I lay back down on the bed, holding my phone tightly in my hand, hoping that I'll get a text back, but knowing that I won't. I feel more tears start to slide down my cheeks, and I close my eyes. I can picture Santana in my mind so clearly, she's laying on her bed asleep surrounded by books and notes. She looks so peaceful, and it breaks my heart.

And as much as I want to blame her for her silence, for the times that she can't be there, I can't. I was the one who encouraged her to go to Louisville, I was the one who got her that scholarship, and I was the one who told her that she should follow her dreams. I'm the one who failed and got held back, and forced her, us to choose… It isn't fair to either of us that we should be punished for my mistake…. Maybe it would be better if we would just go our separate ways.

That thought kills me inside, but if that's what it comes to, if that's what she asks… I'll let her go. Because she deserves that chance, and I'd do anything to make her happy.

**A/N: Please Review, and let me know what you think about Brittany's thoughts or any ideas you have for when her and Santana get together.**


	4. I Can See It Now

**A/N: Ok, that episode was a killer and a tearjerker, and I while I understand why Brittana broke up, I can't just let it end that way. And it's not fair that we have to wait until Nov 8th just to find out what is going on and what will happen next. But let me comment and say that I was very impressed with Heather's acting this season, but especially in the "Mine" Scene. It was brilliant. **

**Anyway, here is the next chapter... I hope that it takes away some of the sadness that this episode left you with. I know that it did for me, it felt very therapeutic to write this. So I hope that you enjoy it. **

**Once again, I don't own Glee and if I did that Laundry room scene would have been a whole lot steamier. Oh, and My Spanish is a combination of 3 years of High School Spanish and Google Translate, so if there's any mistakes I'm really sorry. Oh, and "Mine" belongs to Taylor Swift, Glee, and Naya Rivera. **

**On with the story...**

**Santana's POV**

As I pull into the driveway of my house, a little bit after 8, I notice that my mom is just getting ready to leave. She at least waits until I park and get out of the car to sweep me into her arms, kiss me, and then pester me with questions.

"Santana Marie." She raises her voice at me. "What are you doing here? You weren't supposed to be home for another weekend." She gives me a curious look, one that only a mother can give. "¿Está todo bien, cariña?"(Is everything ok, honey?)

"Sí, mami. Mis clases fue cancelado para el día, así que pensé que iba a volver a casa para sorprender a Brittany." (Yes, Mami. My classes got canceled for the day, so I thought that I would come home to surprise Brittany.) I said, getting my stuff from the car. My mother raises an eyebrow at the Guitar, and then takes a closer look at me; I'm sure seeing the dark circles under my eyes that I know are visible despite the energy drinks.

I hold up my hand before she can say anything to avoid the lecture that I know will be coming. "Yes, I drove all night, and I know that it's kind of irresponsible, and that I could have fallen asleep at the wheel, and you would have been getting a call right about now from the Police telling you that I was dead. And I know that it sounds foolish, but I really wanted to surprise her and this is the only way that I know how and…" My mother suddenly puts a finger to my lips, stopping me in mid-rant.

"All I was going to say was that there is some breakfast in the pantry if you are hungry, and that I love you very much, Santana. You are an adult now, and you can make your own decisions, and I respect the ones that you are making right now." She leans closer to me, and whispers in my ear. "And I've never been more proud to call you my daughter than I am right now. Tell Brittany that l love her all right, and that she should come around more often." She kisses me on the cheek, as I stand there kind of stunned. She waves goodbye before getting into her car, and I watch her leave before going into the house.

It seems different somehow than the last time I was here, almost five weeks before. It's amazing how things can change in that seemingly small about of time… Taking my mom's advice, I grab a banana from the pantry, and I also sneak a bag of Poptarts ®from the secret place where my dad hides them from my mother, before eating them as I walk toward my room. It seems so big now, but I can only imagine that it's because my dorm room is so small. It also seems so empty, now that half my stuff is gone.

My black walls are bare now, and all of my favorite posters are gone. My bed has been made with the guest room sheets, and I make another mental note to thank my mom later for being prepared for my visits, I guess I didn't realize how homesick I was until this moment. I thought that I was just homesick for Brittany, but I realize now that I miss it all.

I sit down on my bed, and gently place my stuff on the floor. I don't even bother to unpack, instead choosing to get the few hours of sleep that I can, so that I can work on the song before going to see my girlfriend for the first time in four weeks and two days. My eyes close, and I'm asleep as soon as my head hits the pillow.

I've never been more grateful for my phone then I ever was at that moment, because I've I hadn't set the alarm before I got into Lima earlier that morning, I think that I would have slept the day away. The sound of Marimba playing dramatically in my ear awakens me from peaceful slumber at exactly 10:00. Normally, before college, I would have grumbled hit the snooze button, and went right back to sleep, but now I just sit up and stretch, trying to get the kink out of my neck that came from driving all night, and sleeping in one position for two hours.

Quickly, I take out a change of clothes, and I run into my bathroom for a quick shower. When I emerge dressed and refreshed, I take out my guitar and I spend my time tuning it. Then I do a quick search for the chords to "Mine", and I give myself a mental high-five as I discover that I was right about the chords and their difficultly level.

I play it over and over again, on the guitar only for the first hour and then with my voice for the second. And by the time draws near to go surprise Brittany at lunch, I feel confident that I can play and sing it without the sheet music in front of me. My heart starts beating faster, and I have to take a couple of deep breaths to keep from screaming with excitement.

I repack my guitar in it's case, and I throw my keys, wallet, and phone into the pocket of my jacket. I double check my outfit for like the hundredth time, before finally deciding that I look good enough and if I check any more I'm going to be late. I'm wearing the black dress, and the black jacket that I wore when I went I had a sing off with that Sebastian kid, as well as the hat. Brittany had always told me that was her favorite outfit of mine, and I wanted to wear it now for good luck.

Walking out to my car, and tucking the guitar case into the backseat, for the first time, I am suddenly nervous. The worrier and the logical part of my brain starts screaming at me, saying things that make since until I remember that they will end the best thing, and the best relationship that I've ever had. Fighting to keep them silent, I close my eyes as I hold tightly to my car door, picturing Brittany's face.

I remember the first time I met her; we were freshman, and Sue had picked us to be two of only three freshmen ever to make it on the varsity Cheerios Squad. She had given us our locker assignments in the Cheerios' locker room, and I remember heading to mine after an exhausting first practice. I reached for my stuff, and when I turned and shut my locker door, there she was. She had this fuzzy red towel wrapped around her neck, and she was drinking out of a water bottle. Her eyes caught mine, and I felt something between us, a spark or something, but whatever it was, I knew instantly that she was suppose to be in my life. I fell in love with her then, even though it took me almost until the end of my junior year to admit. We didn't talk after that moment until two practices later, when Sue paired her up with me to learn a dance move, however, but we were inseparable after that.

We shared our first kiss that I'm ashamed to admit at some senior football player's after game party. We were still freshman, and we were drunk, and the boys that we were hanging with were screaming at us, daring us to kiss, and so we did. That was the moment that I learned two things, 1) that boys were gross to kiss after that and 2) that I never wanted to stop kissing her. Her lips were so soft and perfect, and it didn't feel like it was a dare, it felt like pure heaven. And the feeling scared me… but that didn't stop the moment from being perfect. And every kiss we have shared since then has always been so.

I open my eyes, feeling the center of my universe being restored, as I feel the confidence rebuilding in my brain. Brittany is perfect, and she is the cornerstone of my world, and I simply can't go one more minute without seeing her. I get into the car and drive toward McKinley, feeling my heartbeat the whole way there, my body drumming with excitement.

I find a parking spot quickly, grab my guitar and I run toward the building. A few students are outside, I can feel their eyes on me as I run, but I pay them no mind. I sign in at the desk, smiling as the secretary recognizes me, and I place the Visitor's badge on my shirt with Pride. As I leave the office, I start to head toward the Lunchroom, but then I remember that Brittany said something during our last chat about how Glee was having a lunch meeting in the choir room for the next couple of weeks to narrow down some choices of songs for sectionals. Quickly I turn and head down the hall in the opposite direction.

As I get closer to the classroom, I can hear the noise of the choir being in there, and it makes my heart feel so light and heavy at the same time. As I reach the door, I can pick out her laugh among the noise and the sound of it, makes me smile. It isn't as happy as I remember it, but it's still Brittany's laugh and it's a welcome sound to my ears. Sighing, I place my hand on the door handle to open it, but I stop when I feel a hand on my shoulder. I turn around to see Ms. P standing there, and she gives me a hug without saying a word.

I'm kind of surprised at the warm welcome, but then I realize that I'm not the only one who has noticed that Brittany is so sad lately. "Thank you." I say, quietly, and she nods already knowing what it is for.

"Are you going to surprise her?" She asks softly, pulling me away from the door a little bit.

"Yes, I know that I've haven't been the best girlfriend to her, but I hoping that me surprising her now, will be the start to changing things." I reply. And she claps her hands together in that excited way that she always does when she gets excited, and rewards me with a big smile.

"I'll text Will to let him know about your surprise, so he can quiet down that rabble in there." She pulls out her phone to send a text, but then stops in mid-word, and she looks up at me. "I'm really proud of you, Santana."

I give her a questioning look, wondering why I deserve the praise when I'm just doing what every person who's in love and in a relationship should be doing. "Why?"

"Because when I look at you, I see what love is supposed to look like." Emma answers softly, stunning me into silence, as she returns to finishing her text. A few seconds later her phone lights up, as she gets a reply. "He says to give him just a few moments to finish up what they are working on, and then you're up."

Sighing with both nerves and with excitement, I place the guitar case on the floor, and I pull out my guitar. I adjust the strap around my shoulder, making sure that it isn't going to dig into my neck. I turn to face the door, and I take a deep breath. Emma's hand returns to my shoulder, giving it a loving squeeze that I need at the moment.

"Go get your girl!" She whispers to me, before she turns and walks away. I can hear her footsteps recede and echo down the hallway, and then I hear Mr. Shue's voice from inside the door, that captures my attention.

"Ok, guys. Let's take a break for a moment. I have something that I want to show you, but I forgot it in my office, so give me just one second to grab it ok." His voice gets louder, and I realize it's because he's walking towards me. I quickly duck out of the way as he opens the door, and steps out into the hallway.

"Hey, Emma says that you want to sing a song for Brittany?" He whispers quickly. And all I can do is nod. My mouth feels dry with anticipation, and I suddenly feel like I'm going to throw up. Mr. Shue must notice my sudden change in color, because he takes a step back. "Now, Santana. You've sung in front of hundreds of strangers on stage at Nationals, this can't be any harder. It's just your girlfriend and your friends after all."

"Yeah, but it's never meant this much before." I reply quietly my voice barely above a whisper, and I feel my eyes start to water, but I push the feeling back.

"Do you want me to get everyone but Brittany out of there?"

"No." I say quickly. "I just want to get this over with." I wish that I could explain more, but I can't find the words. I look up at him hoping that he understands, and to my surprise he does.

"Ok, I'll just open the door, and I'll let you in ok, then I'll sneak around the side and sit with the kids ok?"

Once again, I nod. He puts his hand on the door knob and silently mouths the counts of one two three. On three he opens the door, and I began the first chord, even as I walk to enter the room. I can tell that everyone is surprised, because they were expecting it to be Mr. Shue and not me. The Newbie's are looking at each other trying to figure out who I am, and my old friends are smiling at me, but I don't pay much attention to them, because all I can see it the beautiful face of my girlfriend. She had never looked more beautiful than she does now, even if she looks like she's torn between crying and smiling.

_You were in college working part time waitin' tables  
Left a small town, never looked back  
I was a flight risk with a fear of fallin'  
Wondering why we bother with love if it never lasts  
I say "Can you believe it?  
As we're lying on the couch?"  
The moment I can see it.  
Yes, yes, I can see it now._

As I'm singing, all I can see is her face. The room melts away until it feels like it's just us in the universe. Even from the short distance away, I can smell her perfume, and it makes my heart pound. She moves closer to me, leaning forward in her chair as I start to sing the chorus.

_Do you remember, we were sitting there by the water?  
You put your arm around me for the first time.  
You made a rebel of a careless man's careful daughter.  
You are the best thing that's ever been mine._

_Flash forward and we're taking on the world together,  
And there's a drawer of my things at your place.  
You learn my secrets and you figure out why I'm guarded,  
You say we'll never make my parents' mistakes.  
But we got bills to pay,  
We got nothing figured out,  
When it was hard to take,  
Yes, yes, this is what I thought about._

_Do you remember, we were sitting there, by the water?_  
_You put your arm around me for the first time_  
_You made a rebel of a careless man's careful daughter_  
_You are the best thing that's ever been mine._  
_Do you remember all the city lights on the water?_  
_You saw me start to believe for the first time_  
_You made a rebel of a careless man's careful daughter_  
_You are the best thing that's ever been mine._

_Oh, oh, oh_

_And I remember that fight_  
_Two-thirty AM_  
_As everything was slipping right out of our hands_  
_I ran out crying and you followed me out into the street_  
_Braced myself for the "Goodbye"_  
_'cause that's all I've ever known_  
_Then you took me by surprise_  
_You said, "I'll never leave you alone."_

_You said, "I remember how we felt sitting by the water_  
_And every time I look at you, it's like the first time_  
_I fell in love with a careless man's careful daughter_  
_She is the best thing that's ever been mine."_  
_Whoa….. Oh._  
_You made a rebel of a careless man's careful daughter_  
_You are the best thing that's ever been mine._  
_Do you believe it?_  
_We're Gonna make it now._  
_I can see it,_  
_I can see it now._

She's standing right in front of me now, which is funny because I don't remember her moving. She gently takes the guitar out of my hands, and swings it around to lie on my back, before she pulls me into her arms and kisses me. The kiss is more passionate than I've ever think that we've demonstrated in public before, which makes the logical part of my brain note all of the faces that are now staring at us, but I forget about that, as I sense a desperation in her kiss that I've never felt before. She pulls away, and Brittany is suddenly crying in my arms. I'm scared now, wondering if I did something to make her cry.

"I missed you so much, Santana." She says, putting her head on my shoulder, letting me hold her. She's making me nervous, but I don't say anything, my body and mind content to do exactly what it's doing right now. I've missed the feeling of Brittany's body against mine, not so much in a sexual way, even though I admit I've missed that too, but our relationship has always been physical. Even when we were still nothing more than then the best of friends, some part of us was always touching. To finally have that again after four weeks of nothing, was like finally getting food after a month of being starving.

"I've missed you too, Britt. And I'm so sorry for the way that I've been treating you lately, and I promise that everything is going to change after today…" I go to continue on, but she puts a finger to my lips, her thumb grazing over my skin in a way that seems so intimate that it makes my body start to throb.

"Not now." She whispers suddenly, and then I hear a gentle cough behind me that kills the mood entirely.

"For those of you that don't know her, this is Santana Lopez. She was a senior last year, and she's currently a freshman at Louisville University, and is a Cheerleader there. Anyway, we can all catch up later. The bell is about to ring, so please remember to be thinking about songs for Sectionals. Oh, and no practice after school. See you tomorrow." He finishes just as the bell rings. The rest of the class gets up to leave, with my former classmates giving me smiles and nods as they make their way out. Normally I would be eager to catch up with them, but all I want to focus on right now it Brittany. Mr. Shue turns to us. "Britt, I'll write you a blank pass to your next class. Take all of the time that you need." He signs a piece of paper before putting it into her hand, and then he quietly leaves us alone.

She pulls away for a moment taking my hand, and pulls me to sit in what used to be my normal seat here. I look around the room for a second before turning to her. "Sophomore year, I used to sit in this back row and secretly watch you, I counted the times that you smiled at me, and I'd die on the days that you didn't." She smiles and giggles quietly. "Things seemed so complicated back then… but now I realize that it was just a cakewalk."

I can tell that she hears the note of seriousness in my voice, because her face changes. It grows older now, and more cautious and I hate that I do that to her, that over the past few months I've managed to put a damper on her innocence, and that I've made her nervous about being optimistic.

"Are you breaking up with me?" She asks, and I hear tears in her voice as it breaks a little. "Blaine and Kurt broke up this morning, and I heard that Rachel and Finn did too, even though I thought that they did that already before Rachel left for New York." I had forgotten how cute her nervous rambling was.

"B, Let me be honest." I say taking her hand. "I haven't been a very good girlfriend to you, and being in a long distance relationship is next to impossible to maintain, especially at our age. Most long distance relationship go on for a couple of months and then they end because someone cheats or things get weird."

"I would never cheat on you." She says firmly. And despite the fact that I always knew that, I find myself relaxing a little as I realize that the picture of her and Sam that were floating around in the back of my head were just figments of a insecure and a jealous mind.

"I know, and I would never cheat on you either. I love you so much, Brittany, but more than that I respect you too much to do that to you."

"This sounds like a break up to me." She says, and I reassure her with a gentle caress of my thumb across the back of her hand.

"B, you know that this isn't working. And I have to admit that in the back of my mind somewhere I know that my purpose in coming here was to set you free, but I can't do that. I'm not strong enough to let you go, and I know that this coming year will be hell for us, and there is going to be a lot of times where we can't see each other, but I wanted to come here and make a promise to you now to do better, and to talk about making some changes with you, so that we can give us a fighting shot ok? Because you are the best thing that I have in this world, Brittany Susan Pierce, and I'm not letting you go."

The breath suddenly leaves my lungs, as I am pulled into the biggest hug that I think that my girlfriend has ever given me. And I find my lips suddenly locked with hers, as she kisses me once more. We kiss for a while, reacquainting ourselves with each other once more, and I find myself in her lap, with my head resting against her chest. I yawn, as I'm suddenly feeling the late night and my emotional hill climb suddenly catches up to me.

Brittany seems to notice, and she looks down at me her blue eyes shining with concern.

"Wait, didn't you have classes and practice today? And how did you get here anyway?" She says, studying me. "Santana Marie, you drove all night to get here didn't you? And you skipped both class and practice to sing me a song…. If I wasn't so in love and happy that I finally get to see you, I would be super mad at you right now. You would be with Lord Tubbington in the doghouse, and I would make you sleep on the couch."

"No not the couch, anything but that." I wince in remembrance, the Pierce's basement couch is the most uncomfortable thing known to man, and since we've started dating I have to admit that I've been banished there a few times on sleepover nights. I shiver in horror, and give her my best puppy dog look, which is not as effective since I yawn right in the middle of it. "My classes were canceled because of some Student Forum thingy, I did skip cheer practice, but I did let Coach know that since we didn't have classes that I needed to make a trip home, and surprisingly she understood. And yes, I did drive all night, but it was totally worth it since I get to see you now."

She giggles at me once again, and kisses me gently on the forehead. Sighing she looks up at the clock. "I guess that I should probably go back to class… I know that I promised that I wouldn't skip anymore, and I should let you take a nap anyway."

I open my mouth to protest, but once again she silences me by putting a finger to my lips. "Have dinner with me tonight at Breadstix? We can discuss some of the things that we need to talk about, but more than that I really need to go on a date with you. I've missed our date nights so much."

She moves her finger so that I can answer, and I nod my head, suddenly feeling shy under her gaze. I know that we've been dating for almost a year now, but I feel like she's asking me to go on a first date with her, as if we've turned a new chapter in our relationship.

Brittany moves to grab her bag from the floor, she watches me as I pack away my guitar, before she grabs my hand as she leads me out of the room. She walks me to my car, and we kiss again, only stopping to flip off some football players that are hooting and hollering at us.

"Welcome back to McKinley." She says winking at me, and giving me a hug before she turns and walks back into the building. I wait until she is inside, keeping an extra eye on those football players making sure that they don't try anything with her, before I pull away. I look in the rear-view mirror, noticing that I have her lipstick on my forehead. I decide to leave it there, and it makes me smile all of the way home.

**A/N: So this is not the end... They still have a couple of things left to discuss, but at least they didn't break up. Its going to be hard, but I have faith that they can work it out. And as for the show canon, I'm hoping and praying to Jesus in the North Pole that in the next episode Santana comes to her senses and she comes crawling back to Brittany and begs her to forgive her from being Mature and they get back together. **


	5. Working things out

**A/N: I'm back... Sorry that it's taken me so long to update. **

I awoke to a pair of warm lips caressing the skin of my neck. I didn't need to open my eyes to know who it was. Brittany was snuggled in behind me on the bed, and she had an arm wrapped around my waist. I must have been tired for my body to not even notice her presence.

"Britt…" I moan, sleep still evident in my voice. She giggles, and hugs me tighter to her, and I can feel her breasts pushing up against my back, and I felt the lower half of me suddenly wake up at the feeling.

"You look so cute when you're sleeping." Brittany says softly in my ear, making me shiver. I almost turn around to kiss her and to show her just how much I missed her, when I spy the time on wall clock out of the corner of my newly opened eyes.

"It's after 5 already… I didn't mean to sleep this long." I say trying to sit up, but she pushes me back down.

"It's ok… you deserve it, after driving here all night. " Brittany gently moves me so that I'm lying on my back, and she's leaning over me looking straight into my eyes. "I owe you an apology, Santana."

"Why?" I ask curiously, as I try to think of what it could be that she's is apologizing for. If anyone needed to apologize in this relationship, it should be me for not being there for her and answering her calls and texts.

"Because, I've put a lot of pressure on you recently about our relationship status and it's not fair to you."

I open my mouth to refute her apology, but she holds a finger to my lips.

"I've been whining and complaining a lot lately, not necessarily to you, but inside my head, about how busy you are and how you never seem to have time for me and everything like that. But I was thinking last night and on the way here, about just how much that was unfair to you. Sure, I got held back, and yes I admit that it's hard, and that I'm really having a rough time right now, and that I wish that you were here to hold me, or at least be available on Skype or Facetime to talk to me about it. But then I realized that actually, I have it much easier than you do. When I get home from my rough day, I have my mom there to support me, whether it is dinner or a hug, she's there for me. But you, you are out there all by yourself in that huge unfamiliar place. You have to manage classes and homework and cheerleading, as well as managing your own meals and things like that. When you have a bad day, you have to deal with it alone… and I've realized that I haven't really asked you what has been going on with you lately, how you are dealing with the stress of being alone at college. So I'm sorry for that…"

She is crying now, and I can feel my heart breaking with every tear that falls. I reach up a finger and gently wipe them away.

"Baby, it's ok. Don't worry about me. It's you we should be focusing on right now… I'm fine."

"No, San… it's not ok. I don't want our relationship to be like that… and I don't want you to end up hurt. I can see signs of you starting to get stressed out already, and I know that a big part of you stress is worrying about me…"

"What are you saying, Britt?" I ask, interrupting her, wondering where she was going with this. A part of me was scared that she was going to break up with me, even after everything that we decided in the choir room.

"I'm just saying that I'm sorry, and I'm going to try and be a better girlfriend to you, and to be there to help you deal with the stress of being away from home, instead of leaving you to deal with it on your own. Answer me this, San… how many bad and stressful days have you had since you left?"

I thought for a moment, thinking of my first practice, when I got dropped from the midlevel of the pyramid, because of some crazy misunderstanding, and I sprained my ankle. There had been a couple of bad cheerleading practices since then, as well as that day that I ended up bombing a few important quizzes… but I didn't want to tell her about that because they landed on the day that I had ended up talking to her until five in the morning and got no sleep that night, which caused me to fall asleep in class instead of finishing the quizzes.

Brittany took my silence to be my answer, and I hear her sigh sadly.

"Exactly, quite a lot… and I've never heard about them. And that's not how it should be…You deserve better and I'm sorry."

"You are the best life has to offer." I counter "… and don't worry about it. We went through some hard times last year, and you were there for me every moment, even when I know that it cost you a lot in your school work, so if we are apologizing for stuff, I'm sorry for not being there for you last year and seeing just how badly you were struggling with your school work."

She gives me a sad smile, and then bends down to snuggle against me once more. I wrap my arms around her and hold her tight, not wanting to ever let go. It takes me a second to realize that she's crying hard now, her shoulders shaking against my chest.

"What's wrong?" I ask.

"I thought things would be different this year, last year was so much fun, despite us being outed. I thought that since I had the chance to do it all over again, that I would make the most of it, and that maybe since I was held back that maybe somebody would finally realize that I need help with school. But it's not fun… and in fact I feel more invisible. My teachers just write me off as the stupid girl who got held back, and I feel so old compared to everybody else. Even Glee is different… I just hate it there."

"B…" I say softly in her arm, holding her tighter in my arms. I just hold her for a while knowing that there wasn't anything that I could say or do that could take her pain away, and that the thought that I could do nothing for her made my heart ache.

"What if you, just quit… you don't have to graduate B. You can always get your GED." I say after a long moment. She looks up from where her head had been buried in my chest and stares at me, her face a mixture of surprise, worry and curiosity. "High School isn't the answer for everybody, babe. Some people just get their GED and then go on to College or head straight into the workforce." She is still staring at me and it makes me feel kind of nervous. "Umm… Britt? You ok?"

"I love you." She says simply, before moving up my body in a very sensual way to kiss me and I feel all thought leave my mind as well as all of the air that was in my lungs.

"God, Britt." I say after a few moments of her kissing me deeply, and I let out a squeak, when I feel her hands slip under the long shirt I had changed into before I took my nap. I feel her hands start to move up toward where I wanted them the most, but before she could go very far, my stomach let out an unearthly growl and stopped her progress as my girlfriend suddenly burst into a fit of giggles.

Brittany gets up still giggling and holds out her hand to me. I take it, and wrap her in a hug, before moving over to my bag to get dressed. I turn around over my shoulder to find her staring at me again, her blue eyes caressing the skin of my now naked Back.

"B, if you keep looking at me like that, we aren't going to get out of here any time soon." I whine softly, because as much as I want to get my sweet lady kisses on with my hot girlfriend, whom I've missed so much… I'm starving.

After a moment of meeting my eyes, and showing me just how much she wants me, she turns around with a dramatic flair, and lets me get dressed in peace.

The ride to Breadstix was silent, but not uncomfortable. Her hand rested on my thigh, and her thumb kept writing patterns on the surface of my jeans. I reach down and grab her hand, lacing our fingers together. I look over at a red light and smile at her, and she looks at me shyly with that perfect smile that makes my heart light up.

I pull into the parking lot and park, and then jump out of the car, running over to her side so that I can open the door for her. She giggles at me again, and takes my arm.

"Why thank you, you are most kind." She says, winking at me.

"Anytime, my lady." I reply, winking back. I hold the door open as we enter, and we move to our usual table in the back corner of the restaurant.

Sandy is working today, and she greets warmly, a pleasant surprise considering we use to terrorize this place. I order the all you can eat Salad and Pasta, and Brittany orders a Salad and her usual order of Shrimp. I dive into the pile of breadsticks, and when I look up Brittany is smiling at me.

"What?" I ask softly around a mouthful of breadstick.

"I just now noticed that you look different… healthier." She says softly, and almost hesitantly, as if she is afraid that I'm going to take it the wrong way. I understood though what she was getting at… I have struggled with an eating disorder since middle school, and with Brittany's help the past couple of years, I've worked at overcoming it. And having a new coach, who values healthy eating habits and exercise, has changed my thinking a lot. The first week, that I got there, Coach Anne took me into her office and sat down and told me point blank that I was too thin, and that I had to change my eating habits or she was going to cut me.

"I feel better. Coach Anne told me that Sue's Master Cleanse might be good in theory, and healthy for some people, it wasn't what was best for me, then she and the team doctor help me work out a meal plan and an exercise program that would improve my health and my strength. And so far it's worked. I like being able to eat normal meals, without having to feel like I have to throw it up in order be thin."

Brittany reaches over and grabs my hand, and squeezes it tightly. "That's what I've been trying to tell you all along, love, that you are perfect just the way you are, so I'm glad that your Coach was finally able to get through to you. You scared me before you know… there were times when I could count all of your ribs, and it freaked me out. I like you with curves, you look great. Sue isn't pawning that stuff this year like she had been in years past, so maybe she learned her lesson too." She paused and took a bite of her Salad. "Her new little underling is annoying though. Her name is Kitty and she's an even bigger bitch than Quinn ever was. But Quinn was better at it, behind it all you knew that Quinn cared, even if it was about herself. Kitty is just crazy… She started this club called the Left Behind Club, based upon the books you know. She held this meeting here the other day, and she got this girl to go help this old lady in the bathroom, and when she came back in everybody had left, leaving a spare set of clothes behind to make it look like they all been taking up to heaven by the Rapture. Apparently the girl that had been tricked is in the psych ward right now… it was so bad."

"Man, people are crazy." I mutter.

"Yeah, everyone graduated and things just got weird." She says sadly. "I understand how the girl would have felt though… I know what it's like to be left behind."

I drop my fork, and it clatters against the edge of the bowl. "B…" I try to say, but she cuts me off.

"No, Santana. I don't blame you for that…. I blame me. You didn't leave me behind… I left me behind, and I think that I'm just beginning to understand that."

I look up, my eyes meeting hers and not for the first time do I feel a sense of Pride at the adult that she is becoming, and I'm so proud to call her mine.

"I'm so proud of you B… you are so smart." She blushes under my complement. We got back to eating, still holding hands, and once again I marvel not for the first time at how well we fit together, like two puzzle pieces. Because I'm left handed, and she's right handed, we can hold hands and still be able to eat with our dominate hand. It's lovely. It is also nice to not be afraid anymore… no more hiding under napkins, no more casting worried looks around the restaurant to see who might be watching. I can just be me, and I love holding my girl's hand.

" What would you like for dessert?" Sandy comes by a little while later, taking our plates away. I look at Brittany, who nods, and I know exactly what she wants.

"The Tiramisu." I say, and Sandy smiles.

"Just one?" She teases, and I nod blushing. She and Brittany share a laugh, before she disappears behind the kitchen door, with our plates and our order.

"How many times have we split a dessert here, and how many times has she asked you that, and you still blush about it?" Brittany says teasing me, which of course makes me blush harder. She doesn't expect any answer, and I don't give one, instead we share a look, one that conveys just how much we love each other.

A gentle cough from Sandy breaks our gaze, as she sets the plate in front of Brittany, and then hands me the check. I take it from her and she smiles at me once more before leaving again. Brittany scoops up a bite on her fork and then holds it out to me to taste. It's become a tradition, that I get the first bite, and Brittany feeds it to me. I don't really know why we started that, but I like it. I take my fork and I feed her the next bite, and so on until the cake is finished. She surprises me, by leaning over and stealing a kiss, and I know by the way that she gently bites my lip that I'm going to get lucky tonight.

I quickly drop a couple of bills on the table, more than enough for the meal and for Sandy's tip, and gently nudge my girl out of the building. The car ride was silent as before, but the air was much more heated now. The tiny patterns that Britt was writing on my jeans, now turned into caresses that moved farther and farther up my leg, until I actually had to move her hand for fear that we were going to get into an accident.

As I pulled back into my driveway, I realized that both of my parent's cars were gone, and I breathed a sigh of relief. I wanted to make love with my girl, and that would be hard with my parents in the room next door. I open my door, and move over to once again open Brittany's door, but she's out before I can get the chance to reach the handle, and suddenly her arms are around my neck and her mouth is on mine. She walks me backwards until my back hits the door, and we make out for a few more seconds, before I gently push her away.

I fumble with digging my keys out of my pocket, but Brittany helps, and turns me on further in the process. I unlock the door and we stumble inside. She latches on to me again, this time though her hands find a better spot to settle as they creep underneath my shirt. But before they can go where I want them too, Brittany pulls them away, and I let out a small groan. She removes her lips from mine and smiles at me, before picking me up. I let out a screech and she just giggles.

"It will be faster this way." She says which makes sense to me. I melt into her chest, and start placing gentle kisses on her neck as she walks us up the stairs. She doesn't let go of me until we are at my bed, and she gently places me down on it before crawling on top of it beside me in a very sexy way.

"You are so beautiful." I whisper, as I look into those beautiful blue eyes. I pull her closer. "I missed you so much, Britt." Her breath mingles with mine, as our lips are just centimeters from touching.

"Then show me, Santana." She says, gently kissing me, before leaning down and grabbing my hands and putting them on her chest. "Show me."


End file.
